Last night I got my first speeding ticket. I thought the police officer that was behind me was trying to get past me... so I was really surprised when he followed me. The sad part? I thought that maybe somebody they were looking for had a car similar to mine? Maybe I had a tail light out? I didn’t think I was speeding. I thought I was just going a whole two miles faster than the speed limit. Wrong.
It was the perfect ending to a typical Monday. I was zoned out thinking about Sullivan’s first birthday party and speeding apparently... I’m such a rebel.
On my way home yesterday I also wasted time thinking about this:
Why are people with zero life experiences the first ones to give you advice?
Why do they also tend to be so rude/judgmental?
Okay, I know the answer to the second question.
They haven’t seen the ugly parts of life firsthand yet.
And it’s not their faults. Gosh, I feel like these people are lucky! Blessed! I sometimes love to see life through their eyes and hear what it’s like to worry about “normal” things. It’s refreshing, different, interesting and new!
But when I express my concerns or worries, or even make a simple statement – they are the first ones to roll their eyes, take a deep breath, and tell me how I should think or feel. They are the first ones to hurt somebody’s feelings when they are asked for an opinion. Even if no opinion is asked, they are the first ones to offer it up. And they usually don’t understand how much words can hurt a person.
Speaking of words, have you ever read this?
“...in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart."That sentence moves me. It’s how I always feel. I read The Diary of Anne Frank in the ninth grade and to this day, I remember reading that sentence. I said it out loud until I memorized it.
Am I foolish to think that way?
That police officer, who was actually very nice and professional, didn’t know who I was. He didn’t know all I’ve been through, all I’m going through, and probably didn’t think twice about giving me that ticket. It’s just a part of his job.
What amazed me about my first “rebel” experience is how nice and professional he was. He knew nothing about me other than my name, license number, address... okay, maybe he knew too much about me... but when he walked away, he told me to have a safe trip home and to be careful. I was ready to call Josh and tell him about how much of a jerk this guy was, but I had no story to tell.
“...in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart."My point is, this man has to be the bearer of bad news on a daily basis... kind of like the doctors and nurses that guided us through the most challenging part of my family’s life... but they still find it in themselves to respect us. After all, we are human beings... just as they are. They aren’t the ones with zero life experiences. They’ve seen death, grief, and things that we couldn’t even imagine happen close-up. I haven’t met one nurse, doctor or police officer that takes life or the people in it for granted.
I know firsthand that death does something to your heart and the grief that accompanies it is a never-ending learning process. My experiences have taught me to be nice to people. I’ve learned that you never know what kind of day somebody is having, so it’s important not to make it worse. Especially consider this when it’s somebody in your family or somebody you care deeply about.
Rewind back to the second paragraph of this entry. I said I was thinking about Sullivan’s first birthday party... I was actually day-dreaming about my dad being there. If the police officer was a jerk to me, that probably would have sparked tears and a sappy ride home where I feel sorry for myself and struggle with my dad not being around. That’s never fun!
Instead, I drove home slower, continued to think about my dad, and I thanked God for giving me a father who helped form my heart.
I also thanked God for the police officer who was nice to me when I needed it and whatever experience helped his heart.
And then I wished that Sullivan would have been in the car because maybe this sweet face would have made him reconsider??
If that didn't do the trick, maybe this one?
